We hate goodbyes
It’s funny how certain people become engrained into our lives, always there and always available and, really, one of the few people you can depend on to consistently listen to your side, root for your efforts, and simply be a great friend.
And what happens to these people? You take them for granted. You expect them to be there every time you turn around, to be constantly calling and hanging out. Then, when they’re gone, you finally realize what they did to enrich your life – what kind of friend they were and what they meant to you.
Kerrie and I came to a similar realization this past week. Our friend Sara, loyal BMOWP reader and source of music I’d never have bothered to pick up on my own, moved to Montana – a decision fueled by her family and a shot at something new; to get away from the staleness that can come when living in the same city for years when your heart really belongs elsewhere.
I can’t say I have any experience in this. I’ve never been able to pick up and leave, to drop everything and search elsewhere for a better life. I wouldn’t have the intestinal fortitude to pull off such a feat. Disconnecting from such a stable base seems as foreign to me as throwing away a bag of chips because some of them are broken.
Of course, I’m not the one who is leaving, so it’s easy for me to say. I understand that we don’t get dropped in the most opportune location throughout our lives. We are where we are, and if it needs to change, then the proper steps need to be made. We can’t stick around without suffering the consequences, without saying “what if” whenever we think about what could have been.
So it was with a certain sadness that we sent her off last Friday, packing up the house, leaving a job, and heading west with nothing but her possessions and her dog, Calvin. I thought it would take guts to just leave. Not knowing the future makes it seem more of an adventure, a gustier move that will serve to strengthen decisions and build character. She’s got a close family to move to. She’s got a secure rock to build on. And she was sent off with the faith that we all have in her to succeed in whatever she settles on.
And with that, we at BWOMP wish Sara good luck. In everything. Though she took her friendship (as well as Becket’s best friend) to another part of the country, we know that friendship will still be between us – even if it’s not in daily contact, it will be sitting dormant until she visits again, or until the phone rings. At which point, we all know things will be back the way they always were.
A good friendship takes more than just distance to break. Here’s to hoping you find a good wheat beer in Montana, you learn to live with a smaller yard, and that Calvin discovers a friend that’s just half as cool as Becket is. Good luck in everything, Sara. We already miss you.