This is not breaking news


Let’s be honest. You undermine your position as a Breaking News source the second you post “JON AND KATE FILE FOR SEPARATION.”

And let’s continue to be honest. You undermine your need for privacy by going public in every aspect of your life. Contracts aside, the solution is simple: if you are having trouble with your marriage and you’re going to use the undying devotion of paparazzi stalkers as a main excuse, you should probably consider not allowing a constant crew of camera operators to document every move.

Of course, let’s put this all out there. Jon and Kate jumped the shark two years ago, so we should have expected this. It took itself too seriously. It tried to change lives, when all it ever turned out to be was documentation of a failing marriage. It was destined to either crash or fade away.

Is it asking too much for this to become a harbinger of the future of family reality television? Can we all make the assumption that all the networks want is drama, and all the cameras and lights in the world can’t keep that from happening; no matter your security in marriage, no matter your desire to live a normal life in the fish tank of cable television, no matter your assurances that everything will go on as it always would.

It’s not news. It’s reality. So let’s not treat it like something that has never happened before.

This was lovingly handwritten on June 22nd, 2009